Birth on Wednesday
'Summary' Broseph finds out Wednesday is pregnant, and he eventually must realize he'll have to be a father instead of a gym worker. 'Characters' *Wednesday *Broseph *Sabrina *Darla *Stacy 'Transcript' (Shows Broseph down in the basement working out with his weights) Broseph: (gets up) Ohh yeah... (looks in the mirror) Now that's one handsome bro bro. (laughs) (Wednesday walks downstairs feeling excited.) Wednesday: Hey Grey. Broseph: (annoyed) It's fuckin' Bros- Okay okay, never mind, sup Wednes? Likin' my new moves? Looks sexy huh? (works out) Wednesday: (nods) Mm-hm. Anyway, I have some news to share with you. Broseph: (works out) What? (drops weights on his body) Oof! (gets up) Aah, that'll work fine. Anyways, what's the news? Wednesday: Well, (looks down while blushing) I think I might be pregnant. Broseph: Okay, thanks for the news Wednes, sounds goo- (turns right back) WHAT?! Wednesday: I'm pregnant. Broseph: Okay, okay, that sounds... great Wednes, uhh I gotta go. (kisses her cheek and walks off) Wednesday: (after he is gone) Okay. See ya. (Cuts to Broseph with Darla) Broseph: Yeah! She really said it! She said, she, was, fucking, pregnant! Darla: (not surprised) And of course, you're freaking out. Broseph: Seriously Darla, I'm a gym bro, not a freakin' father. Darla: What? You were expecting to stay that way forever? Broseph: Hell yeah, seriously, what the fuck do I do? Darla: (shushes him) (whispers) Don't worry. I know what you should do... Broseph: (sighs) What? Darla: Just sit back, relax, (speaking out loud) and just accept that it's happening! Broseph: (groans) Seems like that's what most bros do! Darla: Exactly. Broseph: (sighs) Fine. (Cuts back to Wednesday resting on the sofa, she hears noises from another room.) Wednesday: (gets up) What's that noise? (Wednesday walks into another room and is shocked that Broseph just built a room for the baby.) Broseph: Hey Wednes, guess workin' out can be useful. Wednesday: Wow. You sure are working fast. Broseph: We need somethin' for our little baby right? (Wednesday hugs Broseph tigtly.) Wednesday: Yeah...thank you. (9 MONTHS LATER) (Broseph and Wednesday watching TV on the couch, Wednesday feels the baby in her stomach.) Wednesday: Hm? Broseph: Hm? Sup Wednes? Wednesday: (feels her stomach) I think it's time. Broseph: Well then let's go babe. (Cuts to Wednesday lying in a hospital bed watching a small TV) Broseph: Say, where's the doctor? Stacy: (walks in) Here I am. (Wednesday looks shocked at Stacy) Wednesday: Stacy? Stacy: Yeah, I finally graduated from Med School. Broseph: Be careful with her, kay? Stacy: I will! I promise! (Cuts to Darla rushing through the hospital to get to Wednesday's room.) Darla: Where is it?! Where is it?! WHERE IS IT?! (Darla crashes through the door Wednesday was in.) Darla: Did I miss anything? Broseph: Well uhh... (Wednesday starts panting) Broseph: You made it just in time. Stacy: Okay Wednesday.. (bends down) Just take this easy. Wednesday: O-Okay. (Wednesday starts pushing, but feels very calm.) Broseph: Wow, I thought she'd start screaming in pain. Darla: (slightly surprised) I guess not. Stacy: Just a few more pushes Wednesday. (Wednesday takes deep breaths as she pushes.) Broseph: (places his hand on her shoulder) Just keep pushin' Wednesday. Wednesday: I am pushing. Broseph: I'm surprised you're not screaming in pain. Wednesday: Though, that doesn't mean it's not hurting. (Wednesday continues pushing) Stacy: Alright, I think I can see it coming... just a little more... Darla: (goes to the other side of the bed) If this quiet birth is making you feel odd, just know that at least I feel better about forgetting to bring headphones. Wednesday: I just said I'm still in pain and you were worried about the possibility of your ears bleeding? Darla: Well, that seems to be the deal with me, I suppose. Stacy: Ooh! I think we have one! (Stacy takes a small grey-green female baby from Wednesday's womb.) Stacy: Ha ha! Congratulations! You're both now parents of a beautiful grey-green girl! (Stacy hands her to Wednesday.) Wednesday: Thank you! She's so cute. (The baby starts drinking from Wednesday's nipple.) Broseph: Wow, I guess she was right about the boobs thing. (Wednesday rolls her eyes.) Broseph: So what are we gonna name her? Wednesday: I'm not sure. How about...Lily? Broseph: Lily? Wednesday: No wait! Maybe Sabrina? Broseph: (thinks about it) It sounds perfect, Wednes. Wednesday: (smiles) I'm glad you think so. Darla: Better than naming her after a funeral flow-- (Immediately Cuts to Wednesday and Broseph walking into their home with Sabrina. The clouds then turn into a morning theme, as the front door opens to show a much older nine year old Sabrina. She smells the air.) Sabrina: (holds up a rabbit doll) Welp, time to avoid death. Broseph: Hey there little bra. (pats her head as she smiles) Sabrina: Hi there, Dad. (Wednesday walks in and picks Sabrina up.) Wednesday: Hi sweetheart. What were you up to? Sabrina: Nothing! I was just going to play with Nana. (holds up her rabbit doll, covering her face as she pretends that Nana is talking) Sister Nono is sick. We have to find a sacrifice to save her. (Broseph and Wednesday look at her wide-eyed.) Wednesday: (laughs nervously) That's nice, I guess. Broseph: Yeah... I'm just gonna pretend she never said that. (END) 'Trivia' *Even though Sabrina will be 9 years old, Blink will still be 5 and Navy will still be 4. *This episode shows Wednesday (unlike Pink) doesn't scream when she's giving birth. 'Gallery' Breast Fedding Wednesday.png 'Poll' What do you think about Birth on Wednesday? Terrible, I hated it. (1/5) It was okay, I guess. (2/5) Good, but not great. (3/5) Now this is cool. (4/5) THIS IS AN AWESOME EPISODE! (5/5) Category:Episodes